Singles and matchmakers or dating services. Matchmakers vs. Dating Services.

Singles decide between matchmakers and dating services.

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Matchmakers and Dating Services
What's the Difference?
I'm Glad You Asked!
By Richard Sides

What is the difference?

For starters, a dating service lets the members choose their match; a matchmaker does the choosing for members.

Being an independent sort, choosing your own match may sound like a better deal.

Let's be realistic, though.

All you have to base your selection on is what the person told you on his/her data sheet or video. Chances are pretty good he/she didn't say much about less appealing characteristics.

Matchmakers have an advantage.

After each match, a good matchmaker gets feedback from both parties about compatibility and suitability. He\she develops a good feel for individual preferences and personalities.

Matchmakers frequently do a better job, simply because they are better informed that we can ever hope to be.

The second difference, related to the first, is who gets "chosen."

Singles learn the difference between a matchmaker and a dating service.

There is nothing wrong with that, more power to them. But the rest of us neat people may be overlooked in the "feeding frenzy" to grab those 10%.

Matchmakers gain an appreciation for the individuality and uniqueness of each person in their group. They can match people who might never realize they would make a lasting couple.

The third difference is responsibility.

The dating service recruits as many people as possible. It's your job to find someone in the group you would like to meet who is willing to meet. you.

Even if the dating service already has a hundred people similar to you, and even if those folks are having no luck meeting anyone who is interested in them, that is o.k. You can still join. Who knows, maybe your luck will be better!?!

In any event, after your check clears the bank, you are on your own with dating services.

That means they must know at the time they accept you, they have some folks who fit you.

That also means they can't accept everyone who wants to join.

If other singles similar to you are having a hard time matching someone, the matchmaker cannot ethically bring you into the group.

Why?

Because it probably won't work for you either until new members change the group's composition.

The fourth difference involves those valuable commodities, your time and your very tender heart.

In a dating service, you make many trips to and from the office. This is very time consuming.

We all know it is easy to have "chemistry" with people who don't have a chance of maintaining a compatible, life-long relationship with us. Unfortunately, lust blinds us to this incompatibility for months.

So the time wasted driving and going through files is nothing compared to wasting six or seven months of your life when the one you picked turns out to be the wrong person for you.

The matchmaker does the "work" for you. Based on your criteria, he/she rules out many people who might look right, but have no chance of a relationship with you.

Even more important, a matchmaker, via feedback from members, can normally spot that not-so-nice person with the good personality who can break your heart.

So a matchmaker saves you time and possibly, heartbreak. If your time and heart are as important to you as mine are to me, that's a crucial factor in choosing between the two types of services.

I realize it sounds as if I am biased in favor of matchmakers.

I am!

Based on my research, I am convinced matchmakers do a better job for a higher percentage of their members.

Does this mean all matchmaking services are a good deal?

Not at all. Some are no better than the worst dating services, and some of the dating services are a perfect fit for some people. Like everything else, you have to use good judgment.

-> Choosing a Matchmaking or Dating Service

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